COMFORT

Little boy-yet a full grown man Looking at his dad At whose side he stands Hero is the name he’s called Touching hands that have worked so hard His passing to his home is no longer stalled What a void, a deep and cavernous loss As the family feels the sting of death The man himself sees the victory of the cross Rest assured dear loved ones your Father really knows best For He’s called your husband, dad, uncle, grandpa and friend To a beautiful place of peace and rest In Him place your life and trust The same as your loved one did His life showed a relationship with Jesus was a must Knowing that the God of love forgave him of his past He walked daily with His Lord His life was strong, sturdy, and steadfast Even at a time of sorrow or pain There is hope in the One who for you died From Him strength and grace you will gain This is what my Dad's life taught He lived to repay the One who gave it all ‘Cause his eternal life at a great price was bought Written by Christian Matlock, My Wife

Are You a Proverbs 31 Man?

As Mother's Day was approaching I began to think about the Proverbs 31 woman. I remember as a single Christian man it was my hope and prayer that God would bring me a Proverbs 31 woman to marry. I believe that most single Christian men would say that their hope and prayer would be the same as mine. After meeting the woman that would be my wife I remember having a conversation with her about the Proverbs 31 woman. She said that this was a very hard and sometimes impossible standard for single Christian women to be gauged by. This made me curious so I began to ask different women their thoughts on living up to or being compared to the Proverbs 31 woman. I discovered most of the answers were aligned with the comments of my wife. As I read Proverbs 31 a question began to develop, “Am I a Proverbs 31 man?” I know what you're thinking, “How did you come up with that question?” Especially since this is a Proverbs that has always been connected, and directed to women. This Proverbs has been preached and will continue to be preached on Mother's Day for years. So how would I come up with a question like this? I believe the answer to this is obvious once you begin to really look at the passages. Proverbs 31, beginning with verse 1: “The words of King Lemuel, an oracle that his mother taught him.” In this verse we see words of wisdom and/or instruction from a mother to her son. In verse 2 we see the providence of who he is; "my son", "of my womb", "of my vows". Verse 3 reads "do not give your strength to women, your ways to those who destroy Kings." In the day that this advice was passed on it was common practice for kings to have multiple wives and concubines. What the mother was advising her son to avoid was participating in adulterous activities that would take away his strength or the ability to rule wisely as a King. Verses 4 & 5 say, "it is not for kings, O Lemuel, it is not for kings to drink wine or for rulers to take strong drink, lest they drink and forget what has been decreed and pervert the rights of all the afflicted." This mother is not saying to her son that drinking is bad. What she is suggesting is that as a King it is better to rule with a clear mind. Verses 8 and 9 read like this, "Open your mouth for the mute, for the rights of all who are destitute. Open your mouth, judge righteously; defend the rights of the poor and needy." Here she is telling him to speak for the people that don't have a voice, stand up for the ones that don't have the means. We can see in these first few verses, of Proverbs 31, that these are instructions for a young man on how to live his life free from adulterous activities and this includes such things as pornography and other acts of loose living. “Being sober of mind” is not only talking about having a clear mind to reason and make decisions with but to “rule with a sober mind” will also keep you from all sorts of debauchery from poor judgement. As we move on through Proverbs 31 and get to the end of the chapter in verses 28, 29, & 30 where there are instructions for a man/husband explaining that he should praise his wife exalting her above other women. Let her know that she has done well; and in his eyes is above and beyond all other women. We see, in verse 30, that her true beauty comes from her love of the Lord and how she serves Him. After examining these verses; the instruction for the young man from his mother, and the explanation for the husband who should be praising his wife for her life and dedication to her family, I began to ask myself am I a Proverbs 31 man? Is it unfair for us as guys to set such high expectations on single Christian women and our wives to live up to what this woman has lived throughout her life. Obviously by reading the Scriptures we see that she is not a single woman but is in her later years of life as her husband is an elder of the community. So in reality the single Christian man should pray for a woman/wife who desires to walk the journey to become a Proverbs 31 woman. The husband should pray that he can be the man his wife needs to feel free to walk this road to be the wife/woman she knows in her heart she desires to be. I hope and pray that this question will be one that men will ponder and ask themselves, “Am I a Proverbs 31 man? Do you live up to the qualifications that a man should live up to who has a wife with a desire to live a life of this standard?

A Man I Respect

Today I loaded up my lawnmower. My wife and I drove about an hour to my mom and dad's house. Their grass was in need of being mowed and my dad has not been able to mow it for quite awhile. I mowed the front yard, both side yards, and was in the process of mowing the back yard when I saw mom and dad come out of the house across the deck and begin the slow and long process of coming down the porch steps.
My dad has always mowed his yard and been very proud of his nicely manicured lawn. He would spend almost every hour of every day outside either sitting in his swing, just piddling around the yard, or perhaps in his pavilion polishing the granite countertops or hanging something new that he had found on the wall.
Today dad came out because he wanted to go out and just look at his pavilion. This was only the second time he had made it into his backyard and his pavilion since Thanksgiving some four months ago.
As I mowed the yard I watched my dad slowly make his way just to the edge of the pavilion stand there for just a couple of minutes looking and then he turned and he made his way back to the house. As I watched him go step by step across the brick sidewalk that he and I lay just a few years ago I began to cry. Dad is just a mere shell of the man he once was. It was hard seeing that he needed to hold onto mom as he walked back to the house. Today he struggled with putting thoughts together and forming the words to speak.
My dad, Ed Matlock, is one of the godliest men I know. I can’t say that my dad was the kind of father that I saw reading the Bible nightly or even on his knees praying daily, but what I saw was a man that loves God, serves Him, and praises Him. My dad taught me many lessons of faith growing up. One of the first ones was serving. My dad was a active deacon for 54 years, and he believed that if the doors needed to be unlocked and things set up then we would be the family to do that. If the doors needed to be unlocked well then they needed to be locked as well and so we would stay and clean and lock the doors after everyone had left.
Hebrews 10:25 says for us not to forsake the assembling of one another. This is another lesson that my dad taught me was to meet with my fellow Christians whenever there was a meeting going on whether it was a Sunday morning or night then you needed to be there. If there was one on Wednesday we should be at that one as well, and if someone was doing something in the church they needed support of their brothers and sisters and we should be there to support them as well.
Another area of faith that my dad taught me was giving. He felt if you had something you weren’t using anymore you needed to find someone to give it to who could use it or if you felt you needed a newer version someone could still use the older one and you needed to give it away. He taught me that as blessed as I am God wants me to give something to someone whether I needed it or not. Not only did he do this with material things I watched him do this with his time as well. He gave of his time when others needed assistance, or just someone to sit with them.
Another area of faith that my dad taught me was in giving the first 10% to the church. This was an area that I watched my dad lead our family in many times. It didn't matter if we were broke dad always honored God with his giving whether we were sitting on top of the world or broke he continued to give his 10% to God and praising Him every step of the way.
I give my parents a lot of the credit for me going into the ministry because of the examples that they were for me growing up. Their teaching me to trust in God, to serve Him, to love others, to give my time, talents, money, and even giving away the material possessions that I may have to someone else in need.
Probably the most important thing that my dad taught me was how to be a godly husband. My dad honors my mother and loves her unconditionally and for this I am so thankful. My dad is not a perfect man by any stretch of the imagination, but he is a man of integrity, of love, generosity, and so much more.
As I watch my dad deteriorate, his eyesight failing, his mind slowing, and his body failing; I find it hard to watch someone you love and respect the way I do my dad. The peace and the joy that I find in all this is in his future. I know when God calls him home he will be sitting at our Savior’s feet.
Dad, I love you.

A Wife's Call to Her Husband's Ministry

I am at the age most people begin looking at retirement. Imagine the surprise I felt when my husband came to me and said he knew God was calling him into full-time ministry! We had been through a very rough church split and were driving almost an hour to attend a church we believed God called us to be a part of. Changing careers was not on my agenda. I have somewhat of a career working in the public school system and was extremely happy with where I was working. I promised my husband I would pray through it with him and seek God’s direction. He began doing seminary classes and preparing for a new life’s calling. Between my jobs at private and public schools and volunteer church work I have 20+ years experience of working in youth ministry Honestly, I was really surprised at how God worked in our lives and placed us where we are. When my husband was called to be the Student Ministries Pastor at the church we’d been attending it meant moving. A precious individual in our church offered for us to stay with him while we looked for a place to live in Gonzales. The plan was for me to stay in our home except for Sunday and Wednesday nights since they are the specific times of ministry. I clearly remember (a few weeks into this new life) one evening, as I was walking, I felt this deep longing in my heart to be where my husband was and to be with the people God had called us to minister to. Yes you understood correctly, I said us. I almost felt jealous that he was there full-time. Although I wasn’t the paid staff member I knew it was just as much my calling to be involved in the ministry we are a part of. So the next day I loaded up my car and went to our temporary home full-time. It took a few months but God provided a nice house in a great area for us to live in. As tiring as it gets at times driving back and forth to my job, rushing to get home in time for whatever ministry we are a part of that evening, it is exhilarating and so satisfying knowing we are right where God wants us to be, doing what He has called us to do. I know most people would think that we are a little on the “old side” to be working with youth, even the kids tease us sometimes, but I believe at the time He placed us here they needed our laid back personalities to ease them through the changes they were going through. It has been an incredible journey seeing all the wonderful changes God is making not only in our students, but us as well. I fully trust and believe Him when He assures me, “I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.” And trust me it is only by HIS strength that I can keep up the non-stop schedule. To see my husband’s heart break over a situation that a student is going through or the joy that bubbles out of his heart and explodes into the room when he sees a student “get it” or sees them grow in an area we’d been praying for them to change in is just amazing. But then, why wouldn’t it be when we serve such an incredible and amazing God. I can’t tell you that students know and comprehend how much God loves them but I do know if they can understand and comprehend that the love my husband and I pour and pray over them is just a thimble full compared to what God has for them then we are heading in the right direction with them to understanding His love. I love our community and the direction the youth pastors/leaders are heading and know that being on God’s side we are going to make great strides in reaching the youth of our community for Him. I love being a minister’s wife and the privileges that come with it. Seeing God at work up close and personal in so many areas as well as being a part of a team that loves God with all their heart, soul, and mind, and want to encourage those of all ages that when we embrace that we are embracing the most incredible life one could have and be on a journey that never stops being exciting. Look out Gonzales, because God is on the move!!!

Every Waking Thought

Being a follower of Jesus Christ and being in full-time ministry consume my every waking thought. This is what it would be like for you to spend the day in my flip-flops. Every waking thought is not only thinking on Kingdom things and the incredible Savior that I have but ministry (children's, youth, young adult) as well. Then you hear something or God reveals something to you and from that point on every waking thought is about that. Recently at our annual vision meeting, our Pastor shared some statistics with us that really stuck in my thoughts. He stated that 80% of our city is un-churched, 85% of our county is unchurched, and one of the cities within our county conservatively is 90 to 95% unchurched. These are shocking numbers; this means that 8 out 10 people are unchurched.

This is where my “every waking thought” is consumed with the W's, what can we do about it, when can we do something about it, and where do we come into play. Along with how we do it, how soon can we get started, and then there are several other questions that come along the way.

Up to 95% of one community is unchurched. These are huge numbers! How do you begin looking at solutions when from the first look it seems too overwhelming? Just this week I was watching a 2007 documentary on” The Pixar Story” where I learned an insight into ministry. In the developing of a computer animated cartoon they discovered that every scene is made up of little triangles and that one scene could have over 1 million little triangles. The numbers were over whelming but it made them think differently about solutions. 95% of the community that is unchurched causes you to begin thinking differently about the way you can reach into their lives and introduce them to Jesus Christ.

Right away, being a youth pastor, I began thinking how to impact the youth. I thought about having a presence at baseball, basketball, volleyball, soccer, softball, football games and etc. would be ways that I could look at reaching into this community. We do not have a church there this is a city that is 20+ miles away and we have 80% unchurched in our own community.

We are doing things in our own community to reach the unchurched, with an initiative that I began when I first took my position as Student Ministries Pastor. We now have five churches setting aside all of our denominational and associational boundaries to come together as one youth to worship one God once a quarter, and with the intention of equipping the students to reach their campus for Christ.

One thing that I would like to do with you, my online community, is to open up conversation and create some innovative “outside the box” thinking of creative ways to impact a rural community that is 95% unchurched. I would like to create a forum where this could take place, be it on this blog or through e-mails. My e-mail address is fluid2819@yahoo.com . Thank you for taking the time to read this blog and hopefully respond. I am looking forward to hearing and discussing some creative and innovative ways of impacting a community for Christ. If you are anything like me I know that you're “every waking thought” is consumed with your relationship with Christ and your own ministry.

Christian Cuss Words Are They Acceptable?

After being in the youth group for just a short time I was appalled by the language some of the youth were using. I began to listen to the adults in our church and even some of them used inappropriate language from time to time. I began to pray and ask God, “Why do these words that are used by the youth and some adults bother me?” Not long after I began praying this God showed me Ephesians 5: 10 I like the way The Message puts it “Figure out what will please Christ, and then do it.” The NIV says, “And find out what pleases the Lord.” I know another version said, “Seek what acceptable to the Lord”. I believe that Ephesians 5: 10 also deals with our vocabulary not just our actions.

I began talking with my students about the use of Christian cuss words. The first thing they wanted was a list of words that they should not say. I was not going to fall into that trap of legalism.

So what is a cuss word? A cuss word is profanity. It is an adjective and the dictionary describes it as the following: 1. Characterized by irreverence or contempt for God or sacred principles for things irreligious. 2. Not devoted to holy religious purposes; or the last thing you said was, common or vulgar.

The next thing we looked at was euphemisms. A euphemism by definition is; the substitution of a mild, indirect, vague expression for one thought to be offensive, harsh, or blunt. For example; “To pass away” is a euphemism for “to die”.

As the youth group met we learned that when you replace a profanity/cuss word with something that is less offensive you just turned that less offensive word into a profanity/cuss word. For example one of the favorite words used by Christians today and even some non-Christians is the word “frickin'” in place of the “F bomb.” I shared with my youth group my Christian cuss word is crap. When I asked them if they knew the word I was replacing it with they all nodded and smiled.

One of things that I discovered through the discussion of “Christian cuss words are they acceptable?” was that they do not like it when their parents or adults use euphemisms because they know the words that they are replacing them for, and they thought they should just go ahead and say the word if they are going to use that style of language.

Since this lesson a year ago this month the use of Christian cuss words have dramatically decreased and it is very rare that I hear any of those terms from my students. When someone new comes in and uses words like that I have heard them tell the new students that they are using a euphemism for a cuss word and we don't use them in our group.

I am not trying to tell you or anyone else how to speak. I am trying to provoke some thought and conversation about the language that we use. Ephesians 5:10; “Figure out what will please Christ and then do it.”

Sometimes You Just Have to Laugh

Second month into ministry, I find myself standing on the stage one Sunday morning in October giving announcements and it happened. I opened my mouth and it just came out and when those things happen there's no taking them back. So let me back up just a little bit to give you some background. October in our town brings two big events. The first one is “Come and Take it!” The whole town comes out for a long weekend of festivities; carnival rides, vendors, concerts, and all kinds of fun things. The second thing is more exclusive to our church. We’re a young church, at this point we're only three years old and from the beginning we have done what we affectionately call “Halloweiner.” This is an event where we go into a neighborhood and we give out hot dogs on Halloween. In our town we have one street that everybody trick-or-treats on and we set up at the end of the street in one of our church member’s front yard. We have our tables set up and our volunteers cooking hot dogs on grills, others putting the hot dogs in buns, more are serving the hot dogs and lemonade, to all the trick-or-treaters and their parents. We typically hand out 1000 free hot dogs in a two hour time span. We also have volunteers who man the carnival type games and hand out candy. Okay, let's go back to that Sunday morning when I was giving announcements. The Worship Pastor and I usually try to have some fun giving the announcements and he asked me that morning what I was going to dress up like for the Halloweiner. That's when I opened my mouth in front of the whole church with the youth right there. I said, “I don't know I'm dressing up as. I think I’ll let the youth create my costume for me. Well over the next couple of weeks the youth did a really good job hiding from me what they were going to do. On October 31st my phone rings and when I answer it one of the youth said they were ready for me and I was to meet them at the church. I drive to the church, very nervous. As I’m walking down the long hallway to the youth room not knowing what I was getting myself into, I get even more nervous. As I get closer the youth room I can see cardboard, paintbrushes, and I see some blue paint. I think to myself, homeless painter who likes the color blue but that was far from the truth. They had me stand on a piece of cardboard while they took paintbrushes and the blue paint and painted me from head to toe. Blue, that's right, in just a few minutes I was painted into an “avatar.” I had so much fun! It took weeks to get all the blue paint out of all nooks and crannies of my feet. Even though I had a ton of fun, honestly, this year I did not let them do my costume.

That is just one example of a funny ha-ha experience. There are other times that all you can do is laugh. Not long after that, just shortly before Thanksgiving, that year that I found a youth conference that I wanted to take our students to in January. It would be an overnight stay in Houston so I scrounged through what was left of the budget that I inherited and I found enough money to pay for a hotel. All I needed was the students to pay for the price of their ticket. I get everything done, flyers made up, sign-up sheets, etc. I'm getting ready to give information to the students and parents for the very first time on my very first event. I have everything worked out. I hand out the first flyers to announce this incredible conference and an overnight stay in Houston. Then two of the moms look at me and they tell me “they didn't know anything about this event”. They proceed to tell me I have to do a better job getting information to them earlier. I just simply smiled and said ladies you're right I'm so sorry. The funny thing about that is that the students of these two women haven't been in my youth group since that event. Another time that is just laughable is the first time I took our junior high youth group out of town for the day. Remember, this is sixth and seventh graders. I posted it on Facebook, sent e-mails, and I text messaged every junior high parent and said we will leave the church at 11:30 to go to Austin for the day. I got a returning text message asking me a.m. or p.m.? Then from another parent I got a phone call asking me a.m. or p.m.? I told them a.m. Okay, I know youth pastors are known for being a little nuts but I will not be leaving the church at 11:30 p.m. to go to the big city of Austin, Texas with your junior high students. This is where I learned that you have to make sure that every “T” is crossed and every “I” is dotted. You can't just make this stuff up sometimes you just have to laugh.